Monday, May 9, 2011

No pressure.

Today is another big one.
You know, one of those days that you have every so often that is a major determinant of your very near future?
I've had one or two before.
I'm not all that nervous, more just confused on how to feel.
It's weird when all of your planning and working comes down to an hour span of time, full of phrases and information that isn't even all that relevant.
There's the pit in your stomach that won't leave, and there's the shakiness too, which is annoying.
It's this teeny tiny block of your life that they teach entire college courses on. They tell you all these things to say and bring and wear and it's like, hey man, am I supposed to go in there or should I send a robot instead? And when you are a twenty-something in a recuperating economy, it is kind of a lot of pressure.
And then it's over. There's no going back and changing anything from the hour.
What's been said is said and now there's just the waiting.

Waiting to see how I will feel.
Waiting to see if anything will change.
Waiting to see where I will be next.

Waiting is not my favorite.

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